Friday, April 15, 2011

Same but different

While in the hospital I made a choice that may cause a bit of a dilemma down the road for us. I was asked numerous times whether I wanted Cab circumcised. The first time I hesitantly answered "Yes" with a glance at Steve. The next time I replied "Not really, but my husband does." Then the final time I was asked I told them "No. Absolutely not. No." So Cab stayed intact much to my relief. Steve didn't put up a fight like I expected, but I think since I was the one who had just had major surgery he figured I should have the say in any other cutting that took place during our stay. But my decision places us in a curious position. When Finn was born I didn't think twice about having him circumcised. I hadn't done any research on the topic and even though I'd occasionally see a post from a crazy "intactivist", I didn't feel the need to. Steve is cut so our boy would be too. And on his second day out in the big wide world, that's what we had done to him. I was shocked when I saw his baby boy bits all bloody and swollen. I cringed each time I changed him and feared I would hurt him more. It looked far worse than the 7-inch incision across my abdomen. That sealed the deal with Cab. I'll never be a nutty anti-circ extremist, so don't worry about seeing rants about the topic. I just did not have the stomach to see his little bits all bloodied up. But how in the future do we explain to the boys why their penises are different? Do I tell Finn that I was stupid and didn't think before signing him over to the nursery that morning? I'm hoping we have a few years to figure this one out because I'm seriously perplexed at the moment.

1 comment:

Camilleta said...

Maybe you can tell him this story... =) Good luck. My brothers are in the same position actually and they sort of just accepted it.