Monday, December 8, 2008

Not so much to do with the baby

Maybe its the holidays. Maybe its the weather. But I've been a edge, I suppose you could say lately. And as a result I've started compiling a list of things that, as Steve would say, really grind my gears. Please, enjoy the rant.

People that do not respect the boundaries of my marriage.

  • Sure I'm fine with being hit on. I understand it. I'm sure I unconsciously flirt every now and then. But for asshats to send me messages via Myspace, Facebook or what have you offering their , ahem, services is just downright rude. I make it pretty darn clear in any online community that I'm a member of that I am married and have no desire to sleep with, or even meet up with random, gross, perverted men or women. Seriously.
  • And while we're on the subject of flirting, yes, I understand that my hubby is a cutie. But he, like me, makes it very very plain that he's married. So kindly refrain from trying to get in his pants. Especially if you happen to be an 18 year old band groupie on a mission to screw her way through every local band.

and on the subject of 18 year olds...

Trampy little girls wearing impossible outfits

  • What the HELL kind of weather are you preparing for by wearing a micro-mini, HUGE down vest, tights and knee high sherpa boots? Are your knees and thighs just THAT perpetually warm that do not need covering? And why do you need Ugg boots in the first place? Granted, yes, we do get snow here in Pittsburgh, but it's hardly enough to warrant knee high boots with sheep lining. You all look fecking ridiculous. Please stop now.
  • Honestly, seeing what young girls wear these days is what made me and Steve sooo happy when we found out we were having a boy. The day before the all important ultrasound, Steve came home from the grocery store and reported seeing a 12 year old girl wearing a skirt so short that when she leaned over just slightly he could see her thong. A thong. On a twelve year old. Ugh. Now, I'm hardly one to be conservative. But, please explain to me what in god's name a child is doing wearing a g-string? The kid is dressed like a freaking hooker, and yet I'm sure her mother will wonder just how in the heck she's knocked up at 14.

Bands on Myspace

  • Yes I love, LOVE to support local music. You see that...local music. So if your band is on the other side of the continent, please refrain from spamming me with 20 flyers for your amazing gig on Saturday. And you can also keep your Myspace and Facebook e-vites for said gig. Even if I had the means to globe trot to see marginally good unsigned bands, I would not.

Supposed friends

  • I know I'm not always the best friend. I could be lame and blame it on getting married, or having a baby. But I won't. I can be lazy when it come to keeping in touch. I know this. However, I do NOT stop talking to people when their life changes. I've noticed that since I got hitched and had a babe a large number of my friends have ceased to talk to me. I understand that maybe my life isn't all excitement and parties, and maybe we're all in different places in our lives, but christ, I don't think that makes me that unapproachable. Sorry I can't just go out and get wasted with you on a whim these days, but geesh, I can still chat on the phone or go out for tea. And if you're weirded out by hanging with my kid, well, then you have no idea what you're missing out on. Because he's just awesome.

Well, I suppose that's it for right now. I'm sure I could add on to this list (and I'm sure I will at some point or other), but I'll leave it at that.

Now it's high time I go and cozy up in bed and watch Finding Nemo for the millionth time.

No comments: